Apperance VS Reality: Evaluating My Essay

After reviewing my comments from the turnitin.com essay, I realize that I need to be more clear in the way I present my ideas. I need to focus on the smaller things to make my essay come together as a whole. Small things such as awkward phrases,word choice, and passive voice. I feel like I can organize my ideas better so that I can be more specific and help guide the reader more clearly. While I attempted  to analyze my ideas, next time I will look to make my analysis flow better within the overall paragraph. I look forward to the next essay and creating multiple drafts where I can catch the errors I made this time.